keeper of my heart

In the past few days, a lot has gone amuck in my life.

Our dishwasher & dryer both died.
My son’s timetable is not right for his grade 12 year.
I feel like crap with aches and joint pain.
Money is tight, and its a shorter work week now.
I just dropped my daughter off to catch the train to school, my husband at emerge for a possible kidney issue, and am about to wake my son for his last first day at high school, all in the past hour.

Yet through it all, I have a deep abiding sense of peace.

Am I afraid? Am I fearful we won’t have enough for our needs? A smidge, but i keep reminding myself who holds my heart.

God.

He is the keeper of my heart, that entangled throbbing mess of emotions, hopes, dreams,hurts, brokenness and fears all rolled into one.

I can rest knowing somehow, someway, He will take all of this and weave it into His plan for my good, my family’s good.

For He promises me a hope and a future, not just in heaven, but here on earth. He has a plan to make my life make sense when i will look back on it one day.

And His character never changes.

image

He always loves.
Forgives.
Shows mercy.
Showers grace.
Welcomes me home.
Covers me.

He has proved Himself trustworthy in previous storms in my life, why would He stop now?

As a worshipper, music (melody and lyrics) is very important to me. It seems I worship more when things are going awry than when they are going well. 

My need highlights His ability to meet it all the more.

So I will not despair, although I don’t know what the outcomes will be.

He has never let me go since becoming His, and will not let His grasp slip now.

When all else fades away, that He is all I need becomes more evident.

Keeper of my heart,
I lift my eyes to You,
Maker of the Heavens.
Standing in Your Presence,
You are never far,
Keeper of my Heart.
(variation on chorus of ‘Keeper of My Heart’ by Kari Jobe)